Someone needs to make a zombie movie where when you get bit it turns you into a singing and dancing extraordinaire.

My grandmother died of natural causes. Or as my family calls it murdered by the lord.

If you think your demeanor is mellow or not particularly charismatic, the material can life you higher. So write everyday, and get onstage or in a coffee shop where they are doing open mice, anywhere you can perform even if that means starting your own open mic night - and be your own self.

If you're 1 of the 3 girls in pics with a greaseball whose arms are around you at a club you lose at life. If you're the greaseball you win.

My advice is: to try and stay really true to the things that make YOU laugh, as opposed to trying to create a character that you think is funny. Some comedians get into bad habits when they are trying to create something that is not them, and they are trying to write a voice that isn't their true voice.

I was home educated but would skip my lessons to go hang out at school.

I miss dating only for that final moment you kiss goodnight, watch her get out of your car and run into the police station.