Sometimes the only solution is figuring out a bigger problem to focus on.

Sometimes, like we all do, I look at myself in the mirror. Sometimes I cry. Like a really hard cry like you just watch yourself cry but then you're done and you're just glowing and you're staring at yourself.

Onstage, it's all just a heightened and more elaborate version of me. When you're standing onstage, your adrenaline is going, your enthusiasm is at full tilt, and the excitement helps elevate you're attitude. I've always wanted to be as close to myself offstage, being funny with my buddies, and that's what I've worked hard on - being authentic to who I really am.

I am going to name a group of my kids after my favorite cartoons, I am going to name them after Transformers.

I don't know if I could kill someone with a frozen turkey because that is a lot of evidence to eat .... unless I found a whole room of people who also wanted that person dead.

Here's how you know that you're really drunk: when you get into a taxi cab and you think the fare is the time.

I'm shooting a pilot based on my show. It's a one-camera show. I play myself.