I say God bless you... I don't say bless you... I'm not the Lord. I can't do that...

Nice teeth is a turn on for me. If you open your mouth and it looks like a battle of epic proportions, I don't like it.

If you take a negative, turn it inside out, it's still a negative. You're just revealing the ugly inside of negative so I say keep it as is.

This is a dream come true. HBO is the highest echelon in the world for a stand-up comedian to attain. Throughout my career I've trusted my instincts to lead me down the right path, and I am honored to work together with this network while contributing to the legacy that is HBO.

Every great thing starts with an idea, followed by a doubt and finally a resolve to abandon or pursue. Victory is a treacherous journey.

It's an incredible feeling falling in love someone who doesn't know you exist.

Jim Norton and Harland Williams always make me laugh.