I heart abortion. Where's the shirt for that, urban outfitters?! And it won't be a normal heart. It'll be a dead infant heart. Y'know what the back will say? Problem Solved.

Germany's like Wisconsin, but with, like, a really bad past.

I have no real talents. If I could make a living at a normal job, I'm sure I would do that.

I actually got a part in 'The Love Guru', that Mike Myers film. I heard it's awful. I got a Razzie award for it, which I'm quite proud of, but I still haven't seen it. I have no plans to branch out.

You can accept that things are awful and still have a sense of humor about it.

No touching... Cashmere is highly sensitive to the oil in poor people's fingers.

Slutiness is a very underrated quality in a girl.