How come New York gets all the cool plane crashes?
Slutiness is a very underrated quality in a girl.
I'm a homer, so the closer [I perform] to my house the better. If I could get crowds to gather around my bed, that would be ideal. I also like doing stand-up in places that I can surf, snowboard, or anywhere that I have a pregnancy scare.
If Canada were really that great, it would be a state.
Bill Hicks is a huge influence. I love him.
Men who don't understand women fall into two groups: Bachelors and Husbands.