I worked in Toronto for two days. And by work I mean sit in a trailer for 15 hours, say two lines, and leave.
Daniel ToshThe day I notice a cyclist obey a stop sign is the day I'll stop enjoying watching them bounce off my hood.
Daniel ToshA white lady came running up to me after a show. She goes, What gives you the right to do jokes about black people like that. And I'm like, Listen lady, my best friend is Cuban. And that's close enough.
Daniel ToshThis is what I say to the most conservative person that's so terrified of gay marriage becoming legal. Just because the state says it's legal, it's not like God's going to let them into Heaven. So you can still sleep sound every night knowing that goal line defense is up at the pearly gates.
Daniel Tosh