I'll do anything usually if there's money involved and little work.
Kangoroos can't hop backwards.
Girls say it's hard to find nice guys. It's actually really easy. It's just all nice guys are ugly.
Saw myself naked in front of a mirror a couple days ago - that's not the joke, that's what we called the setup. I saw myself naked, and I said, 'Holy cow, I'm 'The White Man.' I've heard a lot of bad things about you, cracka.
Is it okay to roofie a girl just to shut her up?
Never trust anyone who buttons their top button.