I'm aware that I should end a joke with the good part, I choose not too.

I'll do anything usually if there's money involved and little work.

I've always thought having a kid that played soccer would be the worst punishment. After watching 3 min of water polo I stand corrected.

How come everybody cheers when chicks flash their T&A, but when I pull out my D&Bs, i'm a registered sex offender.

I'm not a racist or misogynist person, but I find these jokes funny, so I say them.

Am I the only person who hopes that David Beckham has sex with Brad Pitt? I don't know who's in charge of casting in Hollywood, but make it happen before one of them is out of their prime. Can you imagine those two men together making love? If there's a man in here that's junk doesn't wiggle just a little bit at the thought of those two men together - this has nothing to do with your homophobic sexual preference. At that level it's art, you monkey. You should be honored that you share the same restroom with those Greek gods.

The only thing better than the world's cutest cat is any dog.