I have no real talents. If I could make a living at a normal job, I'm sure I would do that.

Big, skinny, regular size it doesn't matter as long as your young.

A white lady came running up to me after a show. She goes, What gives you the right to do jokes about black people like that. And I'm like, Listen lady, my best friend is Cuban. And that's close enough.

Comedy Central wanted to do a show with me, I had a couple failures under my belt with them already, but they still wanted to try something else. They came to me and said they wanted to do something that was internet focused and created original content on their site, so they could compete with the funny or dies and what not. So that was the premise, and they gave us a small amount of money, $5000, and from there it turned into the show.

I have high-definition television, because I felt the lack of resolution was affecting my ability to solve cases on C.S.I.

Cheaters never prosper, unless they get away with it.

A gynecologist is the dentist for the downstairs mouth.