God does not hate gay people. He's just mad because they found a loophole in His system.

Sure I may look adjusted, but I can't function in normal society because most of you are too stupid.

I don't know what popping-and-locking is but I know to lock my car door whenever people are doing it.

If Canada were really that great, it would be a state.

I'll throw a globe at you! You ever been hit by the world?!

The only thing surfers have in common with the rest of America is they're unemployed and they love crystal meth.

If it weren't for men, this planet would be overrun with giant spiders.