If Canada were really that great, it would be a state.

I feel bad sometimes because I secretly hope New Orleans gets nailed again.

Big can be beautiful - just not to me. I find you disgusting; freshmen 15 is not a life sentence.

I'm not a racist or misogynist person, but I find these jokes funny, so I say them.

I’m a Bad Test Taker…you mean you’re stupid?

I can say that. I have a television show.

I love people of all ethnicities, as long as they're not ugly.