My favorite thing to steal is a kiss. You can get arrested for it but they can't force you to give it back.

I don't think I could stab somebody, cause I'm really bad at a Capri Sun.

Girls say it's hard to find nice guys. It's actually really easy. It's just all nice guys are ugly.

I started my own foundation. If you aren't familiar with it, it's called 'Febreezing the homeless.' Who would you rather give money to: a man that smells 4like liquiid garbage, or ocean breeze?

Even the klan revamped their image by losing the hoods and changing their name to the Tea Party.

Recently started flat ironing my ball hair. Come on ladies, you know how it is; if you have curly hair you just want straight hair.

I think boxers are the greatest athletes in all sports for the simple fact that they don't cry. That is mind-blowing. Have you ever been punched in the nose? Oh my gosh, it hurts so bad. They have to go back to corner, where some little man yells at them. 'Shut up, I just got punched in the face!'... If I was a boxer, do you know who I would hire as my corner man? My mom.