I will not date a woman from China, because that is a big red flag.
Sometimes my mind wanders; other times it leaves completely.
Somebody bought me a Snuggie as a joke gift. Haha, the joke's on you, I enjoy it. I toss and turn at night, finally a blanket that's like, 'I'm going to keep you warm.' It's like having a small child with polio keep you in a full nelson - the perfect pressure.
Technically it's not premarital sex if you don't plan on marrying them.
I'm aware that I should end a joke with the good part, I choose not too.
I fell asleep watching the country music channel and woke up racist.