When you're in young love your pulse pounds, your palms sweat, and there are butterflies in your stomach. It's like diarrhea for your heart.

If you have ever typed 'sorry not sorry' I hope you die... not sorry.

One day, I want to get rich enough so that every time I walk into a room I can release a dozen doves.

It's all fun and games until someone gets a boner.

I grew up in Florida and went to school there, and ended up going to University of Central Florida.

Here's a shock: An adult who still hangs out in skate parks is a bad parent.

At least gays don't kill babies before their due date.