Sign outside a country shop: We buy junk and sell antiques.

I read "Remembrance of Things Past" in the original French. I never start the day without reading me some [Marcel] Proust.

Although humans tend to view sex as mainly a fun recreational activity sometimes resulting in death, in nature it is a far more serious matter.

Reporters aren't stupid. We were standing around talking about which of the 900 health-care proposals that nobody's going to accept is that day's hot news. They know how silly that is. But that's what they do.

The letters in 'Brace Beemer' can be arranged to spell 'Embrace Beer.'

To better understand why you need a personal computer, let's take a look at the pathetic mess you call your life.

Because of the level of my chess game, I was able - even against a weak opponent, such as my younger brothers or the dog - to get myself checkmated in under three minutes. I challenge any computer to do it faster.