I'm happy to start on one topic and end on another one entirely, as long as it's funny.

Motto of the U.S. airline industry - "We're Hoping to Have a Motto Announcement in About an Hour."

Magnetism is one of the Six Fundamental Forces of the Universe, with the other five being Gravity, Duct Tape, Whining, Remote Control, and The Force That Pulls Dogs Toward The Groins Of Strangers.

When Prince Charles speaks, everybody pretends to be fascinated, even though he has never said anything interesting except in that intercepted telephone conversation wherein he expressed the desire to be a feminine hygeine product.

The reason it's called "Grape Nuts" is that it contains "dextrose," which is also sometimes called "grape sugar," and also because "Grape Nuts" is catchier, in terms of marketing, than "A Cross Between Gerbil Food and Gravel," which is what it tastes like.

Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling.

We journalists make it a point to know very little about an extremely wide variety of topics; this is how we stay objective.