The obvious and fair solution to the housework problem is to let men do the housework for, say, the next six thousand years, to even things up. The trouble is that men, over the years, have developed an inflated notion of the importance of everything they do, so that before long they would turn housework into just as much of a charade as business is now. They would hire secretaries and buy computers and fly off to housework conferences in Bermuda, but they'd never clean anything.
Dave BarryI read "Remembrance of Things Past" in the original French. I never start the day without reading me some [Marcel] Proust.
Dave BarryHe felt a momentary pang of regret that he had not spent more time with his beloved wife. But it passed when he remembered that the reason heโd gone to sea in the first place was that he had never really liked his beloved wife.
Dave BarryYour digestive system is your body's Fun House, whereby food goes on a long, dark, scary ride, taking all kinds of unexpected twists and turns, being attacked by vicious secretions along the way, and not knowing until the last minute whether it will be turned into a useful body part or ejected into the Dark Hole by Mister Sphincter.
Dave Barry