The problem with self-improvement is knowing when to quit.

Music is like girlfriends to me; I'm continually astonished by the choices other people make.

Critics like Elvis Costello because critics are like Elvis Costello.

On parties it's not about who you are. The real reason to which a party revolves is how good you look.

Stick your head above the crowd and eventually somebody will throw a rock at it.

I knew already when I was seven years old, that I wanted to be on stage and entertain people. I sell laughs. Here, you got one for free!

Nobody's going to get a hot dog at my concert!