I know you're on the Atkins diet, but could you stop eating bacon during sex?

Hillary is in Iowa to listen to what the people are saying - because if you want her to speak, that will cost you $200,000. So she's there listening.

President Obama has two years left as president. I wouldn't be surprised if he gets to appoint two new Kardashian husbands.

Yesterday was the New York City Marathon. Republicans won in a landslide.

President Obama went to India, South Korea, then Japan. He's going to keep travelling until he finds his birth certificate.

Hillary went to a Chipotle in a tortilla pantsuit.

Kim Jong Un's sister got married. That sounds like another Seth Rogen movie, doesn't it?