Bill Murray is on the show tonight. Next week I'll be Goggling 'foods that improve prostate health.'

I heard this rumor that al Qaeda is merging with Hamas. Yeah, I got that tip from Martha Stewart.

Quiet down, we don't want to wake the Russians.

Hillary went to a Chipotle in a tortilla pantsuit.

Are you excited about the recall election? Arnold's campaign has a new slogan: 'Win one for the groper.'

Guess who's running for president? Jeb Bush. Jeb was governor of Florida and he speaks fluent Spanish, which raises the question: What language did his brother speak? What was that?

Yesterday was the New York City Marathon. Republicans won in a landslide.