It's tax season. When I woke this morning and realized it was tax season, I said, My God, didn't we just pay taxes last year?

Martha Stewart is getting out of prison so today the terror alert was raised from orange to pesto.

About half an hour before air time - that's when I become hyper. I put everything else out of my mind and just let that nervous energy surge through my body. I start talking faster and louder. My confidence comes up. It's actually a great feeling.

In a recent interview, Howard Dean admitted that he used to drink and smoke pot. So, now all he needs to put him over the top is a sex scandal.

One day you're the leader of Iraq, the next day you're being checked for fleas on Fox News.

Apparently, there's something hinky about the new iPhones. They're not hooked up right. ... There's a problem with the antenna. They don't like to be held - like my ex-wife.

Love: You can't start it like a car, you can't stop it with a gun.