Hillary's trying to appear downhome. Earlier today she was sitting on the front porch of a general store whittling a pantsuit.

I think the number one public-relations blunder Osama has made is that he lives in a cave-fortress and if there's one thing we've learned from it's that you can't trust a guy who lives in a cave-fortress -- Lex Luther, Captain Nemo, Dr. Evil. I'm telling you the list goes on.

Mitt Romney looks like an American President in a Canadian movie.

Today coming to work, I saw one of those only in New York scenes. It was a rat who had passed out after choking on a pretzel.

The White House is saying Donald Trump has 'zero percent chance' of being elected. Isn't that a little high?

Here in New York City you can now walk around smoking weed and all they will do if they see you is write you a ticket. Unfortunately, the ticket will be to a Jets game.

Today would have been the birthday of Osama bin Laden. It makes me remember when Seal Team 6 threw him a surprise party.