Hillary's trying to appear downhome. Earlier today she was sitting on the front porch of a general store whittling a pantsuit.

Obesity is now a problem in the navy. They've created a new rank: Really Big Rear Admiral.

Happy Cinco de Mayo. In honor of Cinco de Mayo, mayor Bill de Blasio is filling all New York City potholes with guacamole.

Pope Francis is going to go to Washington, D.C., to address Congress. He believes the New England Patriots have been deflating his giant hat.

Do you remember the good ol' days when Congress was only unsafe if you were an intern.

How would Trump travel as president? Obviously, he'd use Hair Force One.

Because Utah is largely Mormon country, the firing squad's a little different. You're blindfolded but no cigarette.