Hillary has now erased all of her emails, and she also had all of her pantsuits dry cleaned.

Guess who's running for president? Jeb Bush. Jeb was governor of Florida and he speaks fluent Spanish, which raises the question: What language did his brother speak? What was that?

This Hillary Clinton scandal has to do with emails. All I get are emails for Canadian Viagra.

Mitt Romney had a horse competing in the Olympics. He didn't win. But next year, he'll be competing in 'Dancing with the Stars.'

The United States has launched airstrikes against ISIS. It's being called 'Operation Approval Ratings.'

You have Kim Jong Il, and you have his brother, Menta Lee Il.

I knew that if I woke up hung over, I couldn't do the best possible job on the show, so I had to quit. Also, I'd consumed a lot of beer for a lot of years, and I thought, That's enough. I've had my fun and I'm glad I quit.