The campaign for the White House is heating up with John Kerry taking heat for throwing his Vietnam medals away, getting a $1000 haircut, and wearing a 1970s wig known as 'the Leno.' There are really two sides to this story. And America can't wait for Kerry to present both of them.

A small handgun makes any TV remote control.

I just heard George W. Bush's new plan for airline security. From here on out, every plane will now have its own hockey dad.

I always liked Mitt Romney. He looks like the salesman who follows you around at Brooks Brothers.

Trump says that if he's elected, he won't let the presidency interfere with the Miss Universe pageant.

Night clubs scare me. They're dark and they stink and they're dangerous and everybody's drunk.

President Bush announced he has a five-point strategy for getting out of Iraq. Points six through 10 will be handled by the Kerry administration.