Do you know who is ready to go with the presidential campaign? Jeb Bush. Jeb already has plans to end the war in Iraq that his brother started. All he needs is a hot tub time machine.

They found a scrapbook with photos of Osama bin Laden from the '90s, and they're studying each and every photo very, very closely. My favorite shot of Osama bin Laden was right between the eyes.

There's already been some trouble for Osama bin Laden in the afterlife. There was a mix up and he was greeted by 72 vegans.

Today coming to work, I saw one of those only in New York scenes. It was a rat who had passed out after choking on a pretzel.

Some Secret Service guys crashed a car into the White House. And they had been drinking when it happened. Actually, they hit a barrier trying to get to the White House. It's the same thing that is happening to Hillary.

New Orleans: The least annoying French place on Earth.

Sunday is the Academy Awards. Every time an actor says, 'I didn't expect this,' Ruth Bader Ginsburg will do a shot.