Stayed up and watched a little spanktrovision. It's the American way. There's really nothing wrong with spanktrovision. One of the best inventions of the 1900s, 20th century.

The last girl I went out with blew me off. Now I call her with lame excuses to see her, "Hey, did I leave a penny over there?"

I'm like a Dilbert cartoon.

Now that I have the opportunities to do a lot, I want to do less.

I think the chances are better of me putting Super Unleaded into a rented car.

It's just a campy blast. I just want to do as little as I can and make it good, and try not to sell out. I'm sure I will, but I'm just trying to postpone it.

I'm always making fun of myself and my friends.