We all know we are unique individuals, but we tend to see others as representatives of groups.
Deborah TannenTo say that a person feels listened to means a lot more than just their ideas get heard. It's a sign of respect. It makes people feel valued.
Deborah TannenAll conversation, in addition to whatever else it does, displays, and asks for recognition of, our competence.
Deborah TannenBut if you parry individuals points - a negative and defensive enterprise - you never step back and actively imagine a world in which a different system of ideas could be true - a positive act.
Deborah Tannen