In dialogue, there is opposition, yes, but no head-on collision. Smashing heads does not open minds.

In an ongoing relationship, each current criticism packs the punches of all the others that have gone before.

The argument culture urges us to approach the world-and the people in it-in an adversarial frame of mind. It rests on the assumption that opposition is the best way to get anything done: Conflict and opposition are as necessary as cooperation and agreement, but the scale is off balance, with conflict and opposition over-weighted.

It's our tendency to approach every problem as if it were a fight between two sides. We see it in headlines that are always using metaphors for war. It's a general atmosphere of animosity and contention that has taken over our public discourse.

Part of the reason images of women in positions of authority are marked by their gender is that the very notion of authority is associated with maleness.

We tend to look through language and not realize how much power language has

Communication is a continual balancing act, juggling the conflicting needs for intimacy and independence