There are two kinds of jackets - reversible, and reversible but it's hard to zipper up and it looks really stupid.

I don't know what the long form of OK is. I wanna think it's okie dokie. 'I'm okie dokie. I'm a little shaken up, but I'm okie dokie.' 'The good news is, she's okie dokie. The surgery went fine.'

Statistics indicate that the average American is a guy named Brian who lives in Ohio.

Man is the most powerful creature on the planet. And we're arrogant. I mean, people own birds. It's like, there's a creature with the gift of flight. I want it. I'm going to put it in my kitchen and make it crap on old information.

I am completely attracted to the idea of simplicity, or at least removing things that seem unnecessary when trying to get an idea out there.

To make even fewer friends try talking about politics as much as you talk about yourself.

To get strangers to hate you even faster, crank up the volume on that very interesting ringtone of yours.