Coffee is like a bra. 3 cups is one too many.
I love Steven Wright.
When I am given a multiple choice test I choose not to take it.
It's very easy to turn a toy into an adult toy: Location, location, location.
Here is a tip for all you young people drinking wine. With pasta, drink white wine. With steak, drink red wine. And if you're vegan, you're annoying.
Americans who do not celebrate Independence Day: pets.