In retrospect, everything is finite, but prospectively, there are infinite possibilities. I guess that's what makes life hopeful.

It would be interesting if Elvis were reincarnated as an Elvis impersonator.

Clowns have no respect for pie.

I used to get bummed out when it rained; then I realized that it's God's way of washing off hippies.

Your mind is like a sponge, in the sense that it would come in handy when cleaning off a countertop or something like that.

I tend to avoid televisions, politics, and places with velvet ropes.

Whenever I see an autobiography for sale in the book store i just flip to the about the author section. I'm like, "Done, next!"