I haven't seen someone so overmatched since Mike Tyson tried to recite the alphabet.

If some unemployed punk in New Jersey, can get a cassette to make love to Elle McPherson for $19.95, this virtual reality stuff is going to make crack look like Sanka.

I'm like Bush, I see the world more like checkers than chess.

Bad television is three things: a bullet train to a morally bankrupt youth, a slow spiral into an intellectual void, and of course, a complete blast to watch.

Nowadays, with history not being taught anymore in American public schools, self-esteem is taking its place.

That field goal attempt was so far to the left it nearly decapitated Lyndon LaRouche.

Somebody can say they don't understand why somebody drifts. But I've always found people who drift interesting, 'cause it shows me the game's not stagnant in their own head. They're thinking.