Just put down 9/11... I think, on most things I'm liberal, except on defending ourselves and keeping half the money. Those things I'm kind of conservative on.

But the biggest fake of the year, Paul Begala's last smile

Even the best psychiatrist is like a blindfolded auto mechanic poking around under your hood with a giant foam "We're #1" finger.

Laughter is one of the great beacons in life because we don't refract it by gunning it through our intellectual prism. What makes us laugh is a mystery - an involuntary response.

A recent police study found that you're much more likely to get shot by a fat cop if you run.

Jack Kerouac was cool because he had no idea he was.

Most Americans will let liberals and conservatives play their games because most Americans don't pay attention.