Al Gore couldn't be more phony if he were a professional Al Gore impersonator

Everybody has to sell out at some point to make a living.

Washington, DC is to lying what Wisconsin is to cheese.

I've seen better coverage at an Alan Keyes press conference.

Americans stick their nose where it doesn't belong more than Cyrano de Bergerac giving head.

Seems to me we move the furniture, the French come in later and put the doilies on top of it...It's a simple fact they've always been reluctant to surrender to the wishes of their friends and are almost anticipatory in their urge to surrender to wishes of their enemies. And if they want to get their hands dirty now they're just gonna have to run 'em through their own hair.

Nothing ruins the mood during foreplay more than the recurring image of your sixty-five-year-old homeroom teacher trying to stretch a condom over a cucumber.