Growing up, my family wasn't very tight. We were more like a tour group with secrets.

In the late twentieth century, staying sober has become just as much an addiction as getting wasted.

I have sympathy for any human being that's driven by their limbic part of their brain. We all know that exists in a person.

A recent police study found that you're much more likely to get shot by a fat cop if you run.

Detroit's so bad this year they might lose their bye week.

They have an amazing proliferation of TV channels now: The all-cartoon channel, the 24-hour-science fiction channel. Of course, to make room for these they got rid of the Literacy Channel and the What's Left of Civilization Channel.

I'm extremely moved by the loving, caring relationship the President always seems to have with his imaginary son.