Now I don't have anything against Mexican people, but for God's sakes, sign the gust book on the way in.

Some people like to travel by train because it combines the slowness of a car with the cramped public exposure of an airplane.

Of course, that's just my opinion. I could be wrong.

Obama better hope a kicked ass is covered by Obamacare.

Michael Moore simultaneously represents everything I detest in a human being and everything I feel obligated to defend in an American. Quite simply, it is that stupid moron's right to be that utterly, completely wrong.

Campaign analysts say that Dean has produced the most innovative web site in this year's presidential race. I particularly like today's blog, which consisted of the sentence 'I hate myself,' typed four billion times. In Dean's case, this may be the first instance where the actually entity represented by the web site has crashed more often than the site did.

Human beings are human beings. They say what they want, don't they? They used to say it across the fence while they were hanging wash. Now they just say it on the Internet.