The very definition of the innate hollowness of leading a political life when you end up on your nearest and dearest moments or most personal evenings with donors. That should - that should tell you all you need to know about the ramble that is politics.

When the hell is Warren Moon going to retire? I mean, this guy is older than the cuneiform in Nebuchadnezzar's tomb.

Americans stick their nose where it doesn't belong more than Cyrano de Bergerac giving head.

Their offense is shakier than Katherine Hepburn after an all-night espresso bender at Starbucks.

Two wrongs may not make a right, but a thousand wrongs make a writer.

You've got bad eating habits if you use a grocery cart in 7-Eleven.

Martha Stewart denied allegations that she had been given inside information to sell 4,000 shares of a stock in a biotech firm. Stewart then showed her audience how to make a festive, quick-burning yule log out of freshly-shredded financial documents.