Washington, DC is to lying what Wisconsin is to cheese.

I cannot tell you how proud watching that [Iraqi] war coverage makes me. I know a lot of people are saying that they think that it's, that you know what we're doing is imperialistic. I watch the way we handle ourselves over there and I've never felt more patriotic in my life.

You know there is a problem with the education system when you realize that out of the 3 R's only one begins with an R.

I think [Ann Coulter] understands that, she's Pavlov's dog. She gets the corn kernel if she hits that drum once in a while.

There's no more delicious irony on the face of the Earth than environmental protesters being led away in plastic handcuffs that have a biodegradability horizon line of, like, 40,000 years.

That punt was higher than Marion Berry on a fact-finding tour of Cartagena.

Growing up, my family wasn't very tight. We were more like a tour group with secrets.