Everybody has to sell out at some point to make a living.

Is it just me, or are the 49ers doing an awful lot of ass-patting today?

Concussion? How the hell can they tell? They're *football* players, for chrissakes!

I like the show [Factor] because it's horny, but it's not skeevy. Where else are you going to get that nowadays?

And I know your next move, I watch you so much, 'There's been no proven link between the secular state of Iraq and al-Qaeda!' Come on. They both think we're Satan. Isn't that a nice starting point? Why are you so loathe to believe they might have each other on lunatic speed dial?

America may be the best country in the world, but that's kind of like being the valedictorian of summer school.

Human beings are human beings. They say what they want, don't they? They used to say it across the fence while they were hanging wash. Now they just say it on the Internet.