The death penalty is becoming a way of life in this country.

A third myth is that men think that women like guys who are dangerous. As a result, guys will often smoke cigarettes, drink too much, and ride a motorcycle without a helmet. The reality? Women don't like guys who are dangerous. Women want us to think that because women are trying to kill us.

The American education system couldn't be more badly directed or poorly funded if the Secretary of Education were Ed Wood.

To me, nature always appears more unbalanced than Gary Busey with a clogged Eustachian tube.

The average American's day planner has fewer holes in it than Ray Charles's dart board.

I think [Ann Coulter] understands that, she's Pavlov's dog. She gets the corn kernel if she hits that drum once in a while.

In regards to Oral Roberts' claim that God told him that he would die unless he received $20 million by March, God's lawyers have stated that their client has not spoken with Roberts for several years. Off the record, God has stated that 'if I had wanted to ice the little toad, I would have done it a long time ago.