The Democrats continue to snipe at Bush. They'll never give it up to him. You know Teddy Kennedy and Tom Daschle pick more nits than a father and son spider monkey team who know they're being followed by a National Geographic film crew.

That receiver was as wide open as Annabel Chong.

Liberals always feel your pain. Unless of course, they caused it.

Some people like to travel by train because it combines the slowness of a car with the cramped public exposure of an airplane.

If you're a man and you have big tits, don't wear a tight T-shirt, okay? It confuses the children!

A developer is someone who wants to build a house in the woods. An environmentalist is someone who already has a house in the woods.

Jerry Falwell says that abortion and homosexuality are sins. Oh yeah? Well, so is gluttony, Jerry. So maybe you should think about dropping 50 pounds.