I'm a tad paranoid. I think the person in front of me is following me the long way round.

A recent police study found that you're much more likely to get shot by a fat cop if you run.

I have sympathy for any human being that's driven by their limbic part of their brain. We all know that exists in a person.

I have the distinction of speaking to you from one of the few countries that still has a communist party.

The second type you have at these parades seems to be the people who want to mislabel Hitler. Everybody in the world is Hitler. Bush is Hitler, Ashcroft is Hitler, Rumsfeld is Hitler. The only guy who isn't Hitler is the foreign guy with a mustache dropping people who disagree with him into the wood chipper. He's not Hitler.

Lotto fever hit New York again this week, and like the old saying goes, 'You gotta be in it to win it'... but first, you gotta have a dead end job so pathetic you're willing to kill five hours standing in line for a 1 in 25 million chance.

What's so touching is the way we fight the war right until the moment our business is taken care of and then we turn on a dime and we immediately start taking care of people. It's like a shock and aw shucks campaign.