The government could take away all the drugs in the world and people would spin around on their lawns until they fell down and saw God.

Political Correctness is inverted McCarthyism.

That kid's got an arm like Uncle Fester at an exhibition of Pre-Colombian... um, Christ, I lost it. I was going for something thick. So what's with the beard, Grizzly Fouts?

Think of Iraq as "East Korea," because it was a shoot the cuffs war for the edification of Kim Jong Il to let him know we've now circled the SUVs. Iraq was about breaking adhesions, getting lean, staying frosty - in short, getting ready for the big Doug MacArthur Memorial Cage Match to come.

I'd rather be funny than wise.

I have sympathy for any human being that's driven by their limbic part of their brain. We all know that exists in a person.

Maybe democrats will eventually turn on Obamacare when they realize you might need a photo I.D. to participate in the program.