There is a chalk outline slowly being drawn around common sense and most people can't identify the victim.

[The Internet] ... is an amazing communications tool that's bringing the whole world together. I mean, you sit down to sign on to America Online in your hometown, and it's just staggering to think that at the same moment, halfway around the world, in China, someone you've never met is sitting at their computer, hearing the exact same busy signal that you're hearing.

How do we know for sure that no two snowflakes are the same - we haven't got anybody watching.

Here in Hollywood you can actually get a marriage license printed on an Etch-A-Sketch.

Their offense is shakier than Katherine Hepburn after an all-night espresso bender at Starbucks.

Now, personally, I am baffled by the concept of racial prejudice. Why hate someone based on the color of their skin when, if you take the time to get to know them as a human being, you can find so many other things to hate them for?

Half the people I look who are health food addicts look sickly to me. Let's start taxing health food. Somebody force a burger down some of these people's jaw because they look a little pale and wan to me.