Everybody is full of crap. The coin of the realm is being full of crap. The best people - being full of crap are our leaders and our superstars.

Twitter! Never have lives been less lived and more chronicled!

I have sympathy for any human being that's driven by their limbic part of their brain. We all know that exists in a person.

In the late twentieth century, staying sober has become just as much an addiction as getting wasted.

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they're the ones who can sign you into the nursing home.

When the hell is Warren Moon going to retire? I mean, this guy is older than the cuneiform in Nebuchadnezzar's tomb.

I don't know about you, but in my neighborhood, they just opened a Starbucks... IN A STARBUCKS!!!