Parenting is the most important job on the planet next to keeping Gary Busey off the nation's highways.

We've got Nancy Pelosi. She never shuts up. It's just occasionally we have to hood her like a falcon so we can get some sleep.

I'm extremely moved by the loving, caring relationship the President always seems to have with his imaginary son.

The Cowboy's defense has more holes in it than Ronny Milsapp and Jose Feliciano after a game of lawn darts.

I used to be sceptic, but not anymore, because now I am positive that I'm getting screwed.

Nowadays, with history not being taught anymore in American public schools, self-esteem is taking its place.

Liberals always feel your pain. Unless of course, they caused it.