I feel like I've been watching Irwin Corey forever. I saw him in the 1950s, and I thought he was old then.

There should be three days a week when no one is allowed to say: 'What's your sign?' Violators would have their copies of Kahlil Gibran confiscated.

Perhaps the saddest irony of depression is that suicide happens when the patient gets a little better and can again function sufficiently.

I have yet to see one of those Comedy Central shows with multiple standup comics that doesn't include someone the size of the Hindenburg.

I confess, I do have to remind myself almost daily that there are people on this earth capable of reading, writing, eating and dressing themselves who believe their lives are ruled from billions of miles away, by the stars - and, of course, the planets.

Can you picture yourself at the age 60 doing what you do now?

The trick to writing for people is, you have to be able to turn them on in your head. And know how they'd word something or how they'd inflect it.