About the time we get old enough to be as wicked as we want to be, we don't want to be so very wicked after all.
Some people have nothing but experience.
Unhappiness is not knowing what we want and killing ourselves to get it.
A humorist is a person who feels bad, but who feels good about it.
[Reviewing a production of Uncle Tom's Cabin] The dogs were poorly supported by the cast.
The beggar is the only person in the universe not obliged to study appearance.