For disappearing acts, it's hard to beat what happens to the eight hours supposedly left after eight of sleep and eight of work.

If all the cars in the United States were placed end to end, it would probably be Labor Day Weekend.

Wisdom is the quality that keeps you from getting into situations where you need it.

If the English language made any sense, lackadaisical would have something to do with a shortage of flowers.

Some of the world's greatest feats were accomplished by people not smart enough to know they were impossible.

There's nothing like having grandchildren to restore your faith in humanity.

Bad news travels fast. Good news takes the scenic route.