Alcohol does not make ugly people attractive. It makes it so you could care less that they're ugly.
Doug StanhopeWhen I say that asian women are beautiful it's not a sexual thing. I'm not being degrading, I find them sexually repulsive.
Doug StanhopePeople who want to kill other people are the last people I want to party with, because I get mouthy when I drink.
Doug StanhopeThe ultimate act of cowardice is the fat-headed wrestling guy sitting behind the frail kid in math class, clipping him on the ear, saying: 'What are you going to do about that, faggot?' That is cowardice. When the bullets start flying past that jock's saucer-shaped ears, that's not cowardice. That's payback.
Doug Stanhope